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[stupetballs]

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[stupetballs]

[Oh that is ... a face. Stop ruining her birthday cake, Wynonna! She looks down at the cake and frowns.]

I would appreciate that. Because I especially don't want any of that.

[middlefinger]

(sorry she'll try to be....less the way she is...)

I'll make sure no one feeds you Soylent Green, I promise. But this cake, I am pretty sure is safe.

[cowman]

( Soylent Green, Wynonna? )

It is. No ersatz ingredients. I personally oversaw preparation.

[stupetballs]

Thank you.

[That makes her feel much better about this particular cake, anyway, that she will quickly divvy into pieces, as well as getting the coffee going.]

Both of you. This was really sweet.

[middlefinger]

Anything for you, Waves.

(she takes the plate of cake.)

I know all you ever wanted was for your family to celebrate your birthday -- and this is way overdue -- but I'm glad you like it.

text | un: jonathan scott

[cowman]

( extricating himself from everything Wynonna-related would never include waverly earp. while he would never out her sister and the reprehensible actions she took, he still thinks it warrants a nudge from him. he knows wynonna and a crisis. he's never been directly involved.

waverly won't recognize the username coming from him, but he tried for ten minutes to change it when he remembered the first one he'd used. he can't use it anymore. not now.

hopefully, she gets the reference. )

Wynonna may need you today. I will be bringing supplies by later before taking my shift behind the bar.

[cowman]

( doc didn't want .. he takes the cake with a friendly half-smile. ) Thank you.

( coffee, please. )

How can we not celebrate? Our angel.

[stupetballs]

[Coffee is coming! And she can also think of a few reasons they might not, given that they're in Hell, but she's happy to do it all the same.

And with that, they will enjoy their cake and a very happy birthday was had. /scene?]

[stupetballs]

[It takes her a second of squinting at the name to try and figure out why it sounds familiar, but once she realizes it's a Property Brother, it all clicks into place.]

What happened?

[Her next text is going to be Wynonna, to try and find her, but in the interim, she wants to see how bad it is.]

[cowman]

( he can't remember if he and Waverly bonded over the Property Brothers pre or post Garden, but she manages to catch on. )

You should speak to Wynonna. I have procured our week's order.

( with Faith. but, he's working today. he is not like wynonna, he is not going to up and disappear. (he can't.) )

[stupetballs]

[She will do that. She will try to speak to Wynonna. But Wynonna's not answering her phone, so she's going to get a little frustrated. A little while after these initial texts, she sends back:]

I can't find her. She's not answering my calls and she's not at her room.

1/2

[cowman]

( she doesn't receive a message back right away. he and faith are transporting precious cargo. it's actually an hour or so later when he finally gets back to her. sorry, waves. )

I don't know where she is.

2/2

[cowman]

We lived more of our lives in one night. While we slept. It was more than a shared dream.

[stupetballs]

[Well, that's ... concerning. Waverly turns that over in her head for a moment, trying to figure out what could have happened that would have upset Wynonna that much.]

Am I still in the Garden?

[cowman]

We are all out of the Garden.

[stupetballs]

[Oh that's a relief. That's so good to know, and even if she doesn't know how yet, the idea that she gets to go home is good to hear.]

But I'm guessing that Purgatory being Purgatory means that things go from bad to worse at some point?

[cowman]

( It is so much more complicated, with the missing time, and with the Clantons. )

In no uncertain terms. Nobody is dead.

( He backtracks. Someone is dead. Maybe not in their family. But, someone is dead. Robin might be. The sheriff is. )

[stupetballs]

Typical Purgatory.

[And she'll leave that there.]

You don't have to tell me more if you don't want me to. But are you okay?

[cowman]

Not quite.

I am more worried for Wynonna.

[stupetballs]

I'll let you know when I find her. But if you need anything, let me know, okay?

[cowman]

If anything is needed.

text;

[middlefinger]

(wynonna has tried to keep waverly out of the stuff with her and doc, as much as possible, but something he said has been needling her since the maze and waverly is her go to for references.)

what's the frog and scorpion?

(she's not up to date on her russian folklore.)

[stupetballs]

[It takes her a minute to type it out, but she does her best to hit the highlights for text formatting.]

A scorpion tried to convince a frog to give him a ride across a river. At first, the frog refused, because he didn't think he could trust the scorpion not to sting him. The scorpion pointed out that if he stung them as they were crossing the river, they would both drown. Seeing the logic in that, the frog agreed and they set off across the river.

Halfway across, the scorpion stung the frog. When the frog asked him why he did that, knowing it would doom them both, the scorpion said that he couldn't help it. It was in his nature.

[A warning about how at times, vicious people cannot help being vicious, even to the point that it hurts them too.]

[middlefinger]

(so doc was trying to imply that maybe just being vicious was in her nature. that's....not great, and she's not sure what to do with that.)

thanks, someone mentioned it to me, but i wasn't familiar with it so i couldn't figure out what they meant. now i know.

[stupetballs]

[Waverly would very much object to her sister being the scorpion if she knew that that was the context, but she doesn't.]

Someone trying to warn you about someone?